A guest blog-post by Amartya Gautam
The Srinivas family, over the past few months has been hit
by the shrapnel from the explosions of creative writing. The attack came from
unexpected quarters as one of their own discovered the writer within, and thus
through the ensuing blogs, reasserted her position as the supreme commander of
the Srinivas forces, inspiring from all in her vicinity, the familiar feelings
of awe, fear and respect all at once.
Battered and bruised, the victims approached the bravest
soldier amidst them. And thus, I write this on behalf of all the unsuspecting
victims, my fate as a martyr decided even as I typed the first few words.
(I must make my case as a brave youth, you see, for I am
informed by reliable sources that the next post will seriously jeopardize my
reputation as the same!)
The aging matriarch (this description alone carries death
penalty), is often mistaken as a docile creature – my friends, for example,
dismiss my accounts of our fierce battles. They insist that Suchi AUNTY is
always smiling, extremely sweet and friendly. Little do they know that our
clashes matched that of bhima and hidimba( she being hidimba, of course), except
more intense perhaps. The skies and the earth have trembled (the rest of the
family and neighbours too), as we fought tooth and nail, giving no quarter.
Even my father’s harried attempts at being a peace emissary were of no avail.
You think I exaggerate? Take another case, of her trying to teach Ananya maths.
The mere mention of it sends the rest of us into fits of laughter, while the
two of them exchange painful smiles, their eyes conveying to each other the
burden of the tragedy only they must share. Typically, the maths lesson starts
with utmost sincerity on both sides. The guru and shishya, ready to embark on
their voyage of knowledge. Ten minutes into it, one hears a reprimand or two
from the adjacent room, in a mildly exasperated voice. Ten minutes later, one
can hear several more of these at a distinctly higher volume, accompanied with
cranky protests from another voice. At this point, if there is no intervention
by some peace loving being, all hell breaks loose and one is forced to consider
that the apocalypse has perhaps, after all, arrived in 2012. The remainder of
the family, while sensibly not engaging with this formidable force in battles
of such epic proportions, are wary of poking the eye of the sleeping dragon.
Mrs. Suchismita Srinivas (Suchismita Sarkar, before
marriage), is much like Hippogriffs – you’re in big trouble if you mess with
them, but if they like you, they can be really nice too. The trick is to dodge
the occasional moments of wrath, and has been so far mastered only by one
person, and he is married to her.
There is one thing that we all agree on, though:
In our household, there is Sarkar Raaj.
