Of Soaps and Supervamps

My mom is visiting for a couple of months – and there are two main side effects of this. The first is that I find myself on the wrong side of the ‘nagging’ process – I get so relentlessly nagged by her that I forget to nag my own kids. The other, more worrisome side effect is that along with her, I start watching all kinds of Bong soaps on TV.

This time too, it is the same story and I have been watching back-to-back soaps on Z-Bangla. And I made one discovery. Whether it be Hindi or regional language soaps, they have one thing in common – behind every successful soap there is a woman (or women). And no, it is not the goody-two-shoes super heroines of these soaps who guarantee their run week after week. It is the outlandishly dressed vamps with their constant plotting and machinations.

This is not a recent phenomenon, though, since the time of fairy tales, this has been true. Except for a rare Big Bad Wolf or Ogre, the chief villain of all renowned fairy tales is one (or more) of the female characters. Think Hansel and Gretel, Rapunzel, Snow-white or Cinderella – every story is set in motion  through the intrigues spun by some evil female – witches and step-mothers being the perennial favourites.

And the trend continues till today, at least on Indian TV, if not on our films. Albeit, the witches and step-mothers have been replaced by sundry mothers-in-law, daughters-in-law, aunts, and sisters-in-law, but the stories still revolve around the machinations of these conniving women!

Another interesting pattern I noticed, is that the physical appearance of these women scream ‘VAMP’ the moment they appear on screen. They have the 'Vamp-stamp' on them, so to speak! The more garish the make-up, the skimpier the blouse, the shorter the hair, the more outlandish and intricate the bindi and jewellery - the nastier is the vamp! I observe that my 11-year old daughter has made quite a pastime out of identifying vamps in Bong and Hindi serials. She will walk into the room in the middle of a serial, and announce “Yeh wali aunty gandi hai!”, seemingly taking a lot of pride in being able to identify the nasty lady at one glance…

Sigh! if only we could tell the intent of a person this easily from their appearance in real life... how easy life would be!

Identifying nasty women in Indian soaps - child's play!

If daily soaps are to be believed, about 50% of all women spend most of their time scheming and plotting the downfall of the other 50% - the ‘good' women! And what is worse, most of the time they don’t even do their dirty work themselves, they work through unsuspecting men whose minds they poison incessantly!

But I have a confession to make. Despite knowing all this, I find myself putting all rational thought on the backburner and getting (almost) addicted to these soaps. My mom is off TV for some days now due to an eye surgery, and I find myself being sorely tempted to watch the soaps she follows, to find out the latest shenanigans of these supervamps!

I hope Ekta Kapoor will next turn to making serials full of male villains who take over the mantle of plotting and scheming from their female counterparts. So here’s looking forward to the making of ‘Kyunki Sasur bhi kabhi Kunwara tha’…

Birthday Banter

Perception of birthdays over the years...

Delhi Diary

I made a very short trip to Delhi last week to bring my mother to Mumbai. As usual, Delhi left me confused as to whether I like it or detest it. I started off on a not-so-good note by landing up at Nizamuddin station. Nizammudin station, for those uninitiated, can easily be termed as the ‘travellers’ nightmare’. It’s utter chaos personified. Amidst the chaos, I debated the relative merits and demerits of the options I had: engaging in oral boxing matches with various touts, or sweating it through a long serpentine queue for a prepaid rickshaw. I decided on the latter, only to discover that the counter just took the responsibility of doling out the pre paid tickets. Actually getting hold of an auto-wallah to go to my destination was my own lookout!

After a long search for a rickshaw-walla willing to go to Janakpuri, I finally found one. Needless to say, he relented only because he wanted to go towards that direction anyway. The relief was short lived, though - the rickshaw-wallah seemed to be in an inordinate hurry to get somewhere. The way he drove the auto through traffic snares, I was scared he would trim the toes of people standing by the roadside. And he drove over speed breakers at about 80kmph, with as much care as if he was driving an SUV over a tiny bug.

I sat quietly, nursing my jostled insides, and contemplated asking him to slow down – but decided against it. Incurring his wrath at that point did not seem a good idea.

Returning to Mumbai the next day, I got stuck in terrible traffic jams at various points on my way home (it was Muharram day and processions were out on every street). And I noticed a pattern – of how Delhi traffic jams vary from their Mumbai counterparts. Here is a representation illustrating the difference:

A comparative representation of traffic jams in Mumbai vs Delhi. Each arrow represents a vehicle, and the arrowhead the direction in which it is trying to move...

While both cities have terrible traffic jams, in Mumbai you keep moving while in a jam (albeit at a speed at which an old snail taking a leisurely stroll could overtake you). In Delhi, on the other hand, a jam is ABSOLUTELY chaotic – and there is no way you can move ahead unless you are ready to do one of the following things:

a) Be ready to knock over the people standing by and drive over them

b) Be ready to drive over the tops of other vehicles

c) Get down from your vehicle and start an argument with another driver – and go on arguing till the traffic clears or one of you kills the other...

But there were some heartening bits of news about Delhi – I learnt that my mother’s presswalla’s (dhobi’s) son was doing MCA… nice! And I read in the papers that for the new lot of auto rickshaw permits in Delhi, women drivers would be given preference – a leap forward again, after the women conductors in DTC buses! Hope the move works out...

Funny Favourites

Some days back, I was wondering if I had enough money to buy full collections of books and films, what I would choose to buy. Mentally, I started preparing my wish lists in different categories. As a person fond of humour, my first mental list was that of genuinely funny Hindi films (rather rare specimens, amongst the multitude of trash like 'Ready' and 'Thank you') that I would like to possess. Here is the list I came up with, of the top ten Hindi comedies that I would love to watch over and over and over again…

1. Jaane Bhi Do Yaaron – The very best dark satire ever made in India, if you ask me! Scene after scene, even as you roll in the aisles with laughter (as I actually did, when I saw the movie for the first time in the theatre in the 80’s), you can’t shake off the feeling of despair from the back of your mind. Even at the end - after that mad climax scene, you are in splits, but your heart is feeling despondent at the fate awaiting the crusader duo. Apart from the climax too there are scenes that are totally hilarious. I still remember the scene where Ravi Vaswani and Naseeruddin Shah (in quick succession, without being aware of the other one's attempts), try to flirt with Bhakti Barve in the studio thinking she is a wannabe model, and both end up with resounding slaps! And the look on the ‘dead’ Satish Shah’s face is so comical, you completely forget he is supposed to be a corpse and go hysterical with laughter. A film that is on the top of my ‘Not to be Missed’ list.

2. Golmaal(1979) – Much Ado about a Moustache! Even now, when I remember Utpal Dutt’s reaction when Amol Palekar’s glued-on moustache starts coming undone, while he sits oblivious of the fact, munching the goodies served to him - I break into fits of laughter. Apart from the main actors Utpal Dutt and Amol Palekar, Dina Pathak’s comic brilliance was a revelation. Playing the socialite actor forced to play the role of Palekar’s widowed mother, she essayed the role to perfection. Remember the scene where she tries to squeeze her ample behind through a small window to get inside Palekar’s house in order to prevent Dutt from discovering that she is an impostor…and you can’t help but chuckle…

3. Khosla ka Ghosla – This is one which will be appreciated more by people who have lived in Delhi  (or should I say people who have survived Delhi J). In particular, it strikes a chord with those who have withstood the sundry property dealers and brokers strewn about the city. The film was so ‘people like us’ that it still amazes me. I see Anupam Kher grumbling when forced to eat a pizza, and I remember my uncle who never eats noodles, claiming they remind him of wiggling worms. Think of the hero of the film being a full grown adult male called ‘Cherry’, and you will find 10 like him in your immediate neighbourhood (if you happen to live in Delhi, that is). Many scenes in the film are absolutely hilarious, but my favourite is the one where Navin Nishchol, impersonating a rich NRI, goes to a five-star hotel to meet Boman, the land shark. Everything from Nishchol’s self conscious walk to his dialogue ‘Aap chup rehne ka kya lenge?’ to the middleman are absolutely top class.

4. Munnabhai MBBS – What can I say about this film- I find some scenes insanely hilarious. My most favourite one is the garden scene where Sanjay Dutt informs Boman Irani he can’t marry Boman’s daughter Chinky because he is in love with Dr. Suman (wthout knowing she is actually the very same Chinky he is supposed to be thwarting). Boman is totally stupendous in this scene – no matter how many times you watch this, I guarantee, you will laugh!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iOhxW2TBsKE

5. Padosan (1968)– Not the most politically correct of films – with a large part of the comedy being provided by the ‘madrasi’ classical music teacher played by Mehmood, who seems to be perpetually fighting a battle with his veshti. But still, I love the film, and the sight of the paan chewing Kishore Kumar, shaking off a lock of hair from his forehead and saying “Arrey Bangdu!” to Sunil Dutt is pasted in my memory.

6. Lage Raho Munnabhai-  I’m not quite sure whether this film qualifies technically as a comedy, since it has a deep social message and also a full quota of heavy duty emotional scenes. But for me, it produces more laughs than most stuff that is passed off as comedy nowadays...

7. Chashme Buddoor – This film, about a couple of jealous guys  (Ravi Baswani and Rakesh Bedi) trying to scuttle their friend's romance with a girl they themselves fancy, is relatively unknown - but I consider it a must watch. I promise, you won’t regret it!

8. Chalti ka Naam Gaadi – Kishore Kumar at his barmiest best, with his real life brothers Ashok Kumar and Anoop Kumar for company. Many of the songs themselves are comic masterpieces. Who can help but laugh at the irony of the lyrics,


roop ka tum ho khazana
tum ho meri jaan ye maana
lekin pehle de do mera
paanch rupaiya baara aana

accompanied by Kishore’s antics!! Take a look at the story behind the 'paanch rupaiya baara aana' at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7sL17TR0uX4.

9. Chupke Chupke – One of the best situational comedies in Hindi films. Raises deep philosophical questions about the English language such as ‘If T-O is pronounced too and D-O as doo, then why is G-O not goo?' Profound!J

10.  Hera Pheri (2000)– Another hilarious sitcom I simply love to watch – rerun after rerun on TV. Every actor manages to do justice to his or her role, including Suneil Shetty – which is quite a feat…

So, this is my selection. If you think there are some which I have missed out, you are welcome to add to the list. Let me see how many of these I can acquire in the next 6 months!

Aunts aren't Gentlemen

For quite a few weeks now I have been itching to get back at a particular nephew of mine. And not without ample reason! He not only makes some preposterous statements on his blog, but also makes absolutely no attempt to make nephewly (yes, I just invented that word) overtures to me when I am in Delhi – steadfastly refusing to come and see me.

A small clarification here. In general aunts are of two types – and here I go by P G Wodehouse’s classification. The first category are the likes of Wodehouse’s Aunt Dahlia - the generally affable and indulgent kind, who pull the cheeks of nephews and nieces and slip a few bucks into their grubby hands when their parents are not looking. The other, more lethal kind, are the broken-bottle-chewing nephew-crushers of Wodehouse’s Aunt Agatha variety.  I like to think I belong to the Aunt Dahlia category, but when thwarted or annoyed, I can quickly turn into an Aunt Agatha at her nephew-crushing best.

In particular, I want to respond to one particular blog post of this nephew, where he waxes eloquent about the pleasures and virtues of being single… and how he is hounded by various near and  dear ones bent upon getting him married. Also, how in certain gatherings singles are looked upon with suspicion.

Well, to be honest, I give him this… he is right about the hounding relatives and the suspicious looks, but it’s quite justified. I might sound a little biased here – but for most single men, a large part of their free time is spent in drunken debauchery.  Just take a look at the pics posted on my nephew’s blog (http://deboozedabble.blogspot.com/2011/08/singularly-me_09.html) if you need proof. ‘Families’ generally don’t mix well with boisterous, single, drunk men. Haven’t you noticed, how some restaurants have clearly demarcated areas for ‘families’, so as to separate them from single men making a spectacle of themselves in an inebriated state!

And there is one thing I have noticed – men who keep claiming they want to remain single, have the tendency to suddenly go and jump into the lap of matrimony sometime between the ages of 40 and 55. The lucky(?) female usually being some bimbette they met at a party 2 weeks ago. Along with their discretion, these men suddenly lose all their astuteness, and end up marrying the most inappropriate woman. Single women, on the other hand, remain discerning throughout their life. They might remain single, but at least they don’t end up making a fool of themselves!

So, as my nephew approaches 40, I have absolutely no doubt he too will bite the bait sooner or later now – and I just have to bide my time till I receive that sms saying 'Got married to Sheila last evening' (or something of the sort), and brace myself to have that last, loud, vindicated laugh… 


Does that sound too cruel? To display so much mirth at a nephew's misfortune? But then, as Wodehouse said, Aunts aren't Gentlemen!

Simply Tintin

Last week, I revisited my childhood – I went to watch The Adventures of Tintin. Aajkal toh combo-packs ka zamana hai...this too was a combo-pack of 3 Tintin stories in one – The Crab with the Golden Claws, The Secret of the Unicorn and Red Rackham’s treasure.

Sitting chomping popcorn and gobbling ice cream in the theatre, I was transported back to my childhood – when I would sit for hours with a Tintin comic in one hand, and a large supply of namkeen, chocolates and dry fruits near the other. My Ma would hover around in the background, grumbling continuously about what miracles I could have done if only I had been this attentive to studies, but I would be lost to the world, transported into the imaginary realm where I was with Tintin every step of the way in his adventures.

I would sit giggling at the goof-ups of the dumb detective duo Thomson and Thompson, smile at the antics of the hard-of-hearing Prof Calculus, and chuckle at the smart-alecky comments made by Snowy at crucial junctures. But my favourite was – you’re right, the adorable Captain Haddock, with his colourful language… ‘Billions  of blue blistering barnacles’ and ‘Ten thousand thundering typhoons’ …not to mention ‘Ectoplasm’, ‘Moth-eaten marmot’, and even ‘Logarithm’!!! :D

If only real-life curse words were so beautifully imaginative, and yet harmless!

As a child, I would have totally loved to possess the entire collection of Tintin comics, but there was only one hitch – they were expensive. I remember buying my first Tintin comic for Rs. 19 – a princely sum in the mid-seventies. And I still have a soft corner for the relative who bought me ‘Prisoners of the Sun’ which I desperately wanted, after the price had gone up to Rs. 27. But it was well worth its cost – I would read each comic a hundred times over, laughing over and over again at the same panel!

People who shared this passion automatically became dear friends. And friends who shared this passion became that much dearer! Unlike other books, nobody would easily lend a Tintin comic to even their dearest friend, though – all chances were that it would never come back.

I was addicted to Tintin till my late twenties. And while watching the movie, all the nostalgia came swooshing down on me. Immediately after the movie, I started showing withdrawal symptoms, and re-read the only one still in our possession – Destination Moon. Now I believe I am re-addicted and am contemplating buying some of them (if not the whole lot) again!

As for the movie - there were times when I wished the makers had preserved the original bits from the stories. And I found the seemingly mindless action scenes at the climax especially irritating – with machines whirring about without making any sense to me, at least. But there were lots of good things too – the 3 stories were woven together pretty seamlessly, and the all the characters looked pretty realistic in the 3-D animation. So realistic, that it was easy to forget that it was an animation film and the people walking about were not real actors!

But the thing I missed the most from the comics were the expressions that Georges Remi managed to put on the faces of his characters – no doubt he was exceptionally talented in that. The expressions on the faces of even the most insignificant of characters are done to the smallest detail. To see what I mean, take a dekko below at the 'not amused' look on the face of the disdainful llama when the Captain makes friendly overtures to it in Prisoners of the Sun! And then, the Captain keeps getting harassed by llamas repeatedly throughout the story, and then, finally, at the end, gets his revenge by spraying water on the face of a llama. The expression on the face of that hapless llama is totally priceless! :) (I could not find that image on the net, and I don't have the comic, but that look is just stuck to my memory!!) Absolutely CLASSIC! And that kind of million-dollar-expressions were missing in the movie!

The disdainful and 'not amused' expression on the face of the llama as the Captain tries to make friendly overtures to it...

I also happened to watch RaOne a few weeks ago. I noticed there were definitely more kids in the auditorium for that movie than for Tintin. I can imagine how today's kids, exposed to mindless violence and blood and gore through TV, films and even animation films, must be identifying so much more with RaOne with its 'ultimate villain' than with Tintin, embodying 'ultimate goodness'.


Sad. I for one definitely believe that today's kids need much higher doses of Tintin and the like, and lower doses of films showing inane violence... though I doubt many youngsters will agree with me...  

The Teen Commandments

In September this year, Amartya, my son, touched that magic number that he thinks allows him to drive, vote, and be legitimately defiant and rude towards parents. Yes, he turned 18.

We had thought there would be some changes once he turned 18. There is some change, but not the kind we expected! He continues in the same vein as before, and is simply more righteous about it… :-/

If he could hand us down 10 commandments on his 18^th birthday, this is how they would go:

1. Thou shalt NOT try to wake me up. Period. At 6 am, 9 am, 1 pm or any other time. I will wake up EXACTLY when I want to. And this goes for ALL days – holidays AND the days I have college.

2. Thou shalt NOT try to ask me about my attendance in class, assignments or exams. You shalt be duly informed if I flunk or have insufficient attendance.

3. Thou shalt make thyselves invisible when my friends are visiting. This goes for Ananya too - if possible lock her up in the toilet when my friends are visiting. Of course, it goes without saying that my friends and I shalt need a regular supply of snacks – I leave it to thee to figure out how to supply the snacks whilst thou continue to be invisible.

Teen Commandment #3: Thou shalt make thyselves invisible when my friends are visiting.

4. Thou shalt NOT ask unto me where I am going when I step out. Ask no difficult questions and thou shalt hear no lies. (This part goes for the next commandment too)

5. Thou shalt NOT ask unto me totally silly, irrelevant, and absolutely unanswerable questions - like ‘What time will you be back from the party?’

6. Thou shalt drop me (and pick me up) at/from wherever I want, and at any time I want - be it 6 in the morning, or 12 midnight, with a smile and without even a little hint of a grumble.

7. Thou shalt buy me my own vehicle ASAP after my 18^th birthday – it is my birthright, and moreover, all my friends have one.

8. Thou shalt not make ridiculous and irrational demands of me - like asking me to put my dirty clothes in the laundry basket instead of strewing them about in creative formations in and around my room.

9. Thou shalt not make even more ridiculous and absolutely irrational demands of me – like asking me to keep within the speed limit when I am driving.

10. In case any of the above commandments are violated, I shalt hold full rights to argue my case with extreme vehemence and without any heed to the words thou speaketh. And hence the last commandment: Thou shalt concede any argument that we have in my favour.

So you see, touching the magic number didn’t really convert him magically into a serious and responsible adult.

But there is hope. He has actually started doing his assignments. Sometimes he actually cleans up his cupboard. And occasionally he comes into our room to discuss the pros and cons of various prospective careers with his dad.

Lagta hai ab Dilli door nahin…

Delhi... Lost and Found

Recently, I made a trip to Delhi, to visit Ma. I mostly stayed indoors, catching up on all the family gossip with Ma, and of course, clearing the hundreds of spam sms’s flooding her phone inbox...:-/ http://womaninterrupted-merablog.blogspot.com/2011/02/mother-of-all-technologies.html

But even the limited time I spent out on the streets of Delhi gave me something to think about. In many ways, I started rediscovering the city I grew up in...

Delhi dehleez

On the August Kranti from Mumbai to Delhi, my immediate neighbours in the compartment were 4 men (not traveling together). They started conversing  as soon as the train started. They spoke in a coarse tongue, and their conversation consisted solely of business deals and money talk. “Haan haan, woh do lakh maang raha hai toh kal hi pahuncha de na usey paise!” sort of thing. The only time they deviated from the topic of ‘making money’ was when a couple of them waxed eloquent about the greatness of Delhi and rued the fact they had to travel to Mumbai so often for business.

Come night. One of the men clambered on to the top berth, and almost immediately, started snoring. Actually, to call it simply ‘snoring’ is an insult - the sound was roughly equivalent to 5 trains ramming simultaneously into a mountain, and then letting out a loud, anguished whistle. In the morning, one of the other men, tongue firmly in cheek, asked him, “Achchhi neend aayi?” “Haan ji, mujhe toh bahut badhiya neend aayi”, he replied. The first man shot back, “Aur aapki badhiya neend ne hum sab ko poori raat jagaye rakha!”

I could not help smiling! Simple. Direct. Unpretentious. Two years ago I would have been judgemental. But now, I found myself wondering which is better - artlessness and unsophistication, or the pretentious world where you go ‘Hey…lovely to see you!’ and ‘muah muah’ even at your worst enemies at a party…

‘Apne shahar ki toh baat hi alag hai…Dilli toh dilwalon ki’, one of them quipped, as the train chugged into Delhi.

Delhi Belle

I don’t know what made me travel by a DTC bus that day. And I definitely don’t remember when I last rode on one – definitely not in the last 15 years.

I was to visit a friend in far-flung Sarita Vihar, and I had every intention of using the universally applauded Delhi Metro. But at the last minute I changed my mind, and hopped into an AC bus on route 724…can’t think of any good reason for doing it, except the corny: ‘It was fate’. It probably was – I was destined to meet someone.

Inside the bus, I looked around for a ‘safe’ seat – having grown up in Delhi and being well aware of the noxious ‘paws’ lurking around in DTC buses. My eyes zeroed in on an empty seat next to a demure looking, smartly turned out young woman in her 20’s, and I went and sat down there.

Next, I started looking around for the conductor. A man strode purposefully towards us from the front of the bus. He came right up to where we sat and held out his hand to the young lady sitting next to me. The lady dug into her large bag. Ok, here he is, thought I, and rummaged into my bag to locate my wallet. Pulling out the cash, I turned towards the man to collect my ticket – and got a HUGE surprise.

It was the well-dressed woman next to me who was handing over the ticket – she was the conductor of bus #724!!! And even as I sat there - blushing inwardly for my presumptuousness and marveling at the whole idea of a woman conductor in a DTC bus, she hollered, in a strict school-principalish voice, “Haan bhaiya! Aage wale aa kar apne apne ticket le lo!”

I was completely fascinated, and spent the rest of my journey chatting with her. Most of what I heard was a pleasant surprise. Hired after the Commonwealth Games, these women came looking for the security of a government job – the coveted ‘sarkari naukri’. This particular lady had left a ‘desk job’ with a private company for this. Women conductors are put on day shifts, ending by 4 or so, for safety. But still, she was looking forward to being promoted to a desk job soon.

Crossing all limits of inquisitiveness, I asked her whether the crowd in AC buses behaved any better than in the others. Not really, she replied - in fact they misbehaved with more confidence!

A man came up to me (mistaking me for the conductor) and asked for a ticket… I could not decide whether to feel pleased or insulted – and ended up feeling bemused. But overall, it would be a rather adventurous job, I surmised…

Did she like this job? I asked, pushing the boundaries of politeness again. She gave me one withering look – “Would you?” Well, that put me firmly in my place!

Lost and Found

But still, the whole idea was a big and bold step forward for Delhi, I thought. And somehow, after a long, long time I started liking Delhi again during this trip…

Of course, the ubiquitous traffic snares are still very much in place, and your ears get tired trying to beep out all the ma-behn gaalis being bandied about, and no Delhi public place is quite complete without a few men standing around scratching their balls with supreme abandon…

But still, on looking inside myself, I could no longer find the active dislike for the city that I had developed some years ago.

And that brings me to the inevitable - the ‘Mumbai vs Delhi’ bit…

I have lived in Mumbai for over 5 years now. It is supremely impersonal. Everyone is immersed in themselves - nobody gives a damn for anyone else… so much so, that sometimes you start wondering if you really exist! So maybe that is why I found Delhi a welcome change – where people at least notice you, even if it is to drive too close to the pavement you are walking on - to splash muddy water from a puddle on to you (on purpose, naturally). Or lean out of their vehicle at a traffic signal to stare at you as if you were the last specimen of a female homo-sapien left on earth…

Delhi is the city of my birth... the place where I grew up, went to school and college, started my career, got married. But somewhere down the line I had distanced myself from it. It was a good place to go shopping and have fun times with friends, but that was it.

But this time, I started feeling reconnected to the city again. Of course, the DTC experience and all had something to do with it. But I think a lot of it was also due to a meeting with my school-friend Gautami. Time melted away as we spoke of the days gone by, giggled at juvenile jokes, and shared the most heartfelt joys and sorrows.

As I put on my red-and-black shoes to go out, she said ‘Oye, 40 saal ki ho gayi hai - sharam nahi aati laal jootey pehente huey!’ And then suddenly realised she was carrying a large red purse - and we both went into fits of laughter...Nobody could have guessed we were meeting after so many years – yes, it had taken us 22 long years to ‘find’ each other again.

And it was the same with Delhi. And I plan to keep in touch – with the people and places that matter. I guess, there comes a time in your life when you need to ‘Get back to where you once belonged’…